Right, class, we've a lot to get through today so pay attention. That includes you at the back, Nick - yes you - stop picking your nose and listen up. No, I don't care if you've been made redundant.
So, I haven't posted in a while because we had to go back to the UK. It was a secret, so I couldn't talk about it. Well, I could've, but then Mrs C would've killed you, and then killed me, so it really wasn't worth it.
So, we went back for Mrs C's Mother's secret birthday party (her age is a secret as well) and it was a great success. Organised by all the daughters, everyone managed to keep their mouths shut during 3 months of planning and the Mother-in-Law was greatly surprised to see everyone gathered in the bar of the Selsdon Park Hotel. It took her a full 30 seconds to clock me and the missus standing there and blurt out "Hang on - what are you doing here?" I get that a lot, to be honest.
Other than that, the trip to the UK was just plain busy. It was great to catch up with people (including Skean, in a bar in Balham. Oh, the irony) but we tried to do too much and I just ended up looking forward to coming back to number two home. Also, it really rains in London doesn't it? That just sucks.
What also sucks is the stuff we missed whilst we were away. Scottish John, as regular readers will be aware, quit his job as TC's chef in order to pursue a career in film in Estonia or somewhere. He consequently had a "leaving do" and got "a bit drunk" like Scottish people do. Some other geezer from Aberdeen said "Ah yes, we all supped from the Mother's cup." I have no idea what that means.
Then it was the first of TC's infamous rail jams which was apparently a great success. Ozzy Aaron kept everyone amused for the second year running with his ridiculous attempts at the wall, mostly ending up on his arse or his head. Felicity (of nearly naked fame) had a splendid crash by catching an edge just at the wrong moment and flying face-first into the wall ride. It was proper cartoon-like with a satisfying crunch, brief pause, and then slide down to the ground. Boyfriend Andy would have rushed in to help had he not just been served a luscious burger by Duncan, so Duncan just called for a round of applause and "Old Man" Tony put his camera down long enough to enquire if she was still alive.
As luck would have it, she
was still alive, but a mere four hours later was attempting the treacherous slope outside the JamBar (Lady of Leisure Lou knows all about that one) when her legs went from under her and she slammed face-first into the floor. Concussion and 6 stitches through the eyebrow swiftly followed. Is someone trying to tell this girl something? Stop drinking so much, probably.
As if that wasn't enough, we missed out on the X-Box Big Day Out in Val d'Isere, although to be honest it was a bit of a washout (snowout?) - the Avalanche risk was so high, the competitors for the "Big Air" weren't able to hitch their usual ride up on a snowcat, so had to hike up to take their jumps. They still managed to "Go Huge" whilst the Sratch Perverts, Fabio and Grooverider provided the choons and I think a good night was had by all that went, but it just wasn't the same as last year.
You'll have gathered that it snowed a lot whilst we were back in the UK - this is a) A Good Thing as it means that the season will probably last into May again, but is also b) A Bad Thing because it meant we had to stick the chains on half way up the hill on our way back. At least we're now dab hands at the old snow-chain shuffle, unlike the two German guys in their very posh Beamer who couldn't go two metres without their very posh chains wrapping themselves around the very posh rear-axels (should go on front wheels, nein? Maybe it was rear-wheel drive) and found themselves asking "Wie komme ich am besten zum Snowchainhoff, bitte?" (probably)
What else is new? Tignesis-Tots goes from strength to strength with new staff coming to close out the season. Carla's joined us, replacing Rachel who's had to return to the UK for personal reasons. Rosie's sister-in-law Rachel (what
is it with that name?) has also joined the crew, as has Mrs C's good friend Heidi who very kindly came out for a week to cover the various changes - she's never been to the Alps before, but after four days here looks to be seriously considering coming out again next month.
"But what of the brownies?" I hear you cry? Ne Cry-ye pas, I say, since the brownie uptake this year has also been very encouraging. White chocolate chip is the flavour of choice this season and we've been selling out every couple of days. "That's the best thing I've ever put in my mouth" said Emily, and she's married and everything. Video footage to follow (of the brownies, not Emily)
Anything else...I'm sure there's something...Oh yeah:
( New photos behind the link... )